Shop
Things we make to piss off people you love. Personalized, printed, shipped. More coming.
Printed Things
108 items
The Custom Body PillowFleece or microfiber, and long enough that they will end up hugging it.Pillowsannoyingfrom $89.00
The Custom Scented CandleNine scents, one of which is Unscented.Candlesannoyingfrom $30.00
The Custom Cutting BoardGlass, textured, and directly underneath dinner.Cutting Boardsannoyingfrom $33.00
The Custom PosterTheir picture, at gallery scale, on a wall they have to walk past. Blessing still required.PostersFramed Canvasannoyingfrom $24.00
The Custom Tank TopPrinted on the front of the least amount of shirt there is.Tank Topsannoyingfrom $27.00
The Custom CrewneckEight sizes of the sweatshirt that never quite comes back.Sweatshirtsannoyingfrom $40.00
Bathroom ResidencyThe friend you love made one quick bathroom visit. It now has blank archive cards, gallery hours, and a waiting policy.Shower Curtainsannoyingconcerninghostilefrom $69.00
Coffee Order ArchiveThe friend you love has one familiar coffee order. Someone who should know it has now funded a permanent archive.Postersannoyingconcerninghostilefrom $24.00
Espresso CeremonyThe home barista you love makes one modest cup. The kitchen now has a permanent production zone.Floor Matsannoyingconcerninghostilefrom $53.00
Mandatory ListeningThe recommendation now has an intake queue, a department, and follow-up questions.Door Matsannoyingconcerninghostilefrom $49.00
Podcast AssignmentThe friend you love sent one episode. The group chat now has a syllabus and progress trays.Desk Matsannoyingconcerninghostilefrom $24.00
Podcast RecapThe friend you love offered one quick summary. The house now has a permanent oral-history archive and rows of empty chairs.Tapestriesannoyingconcerninghostilefrom $36.00
The Birthday OfficeThe guest of honor is taking a nap. Operations continue.Tote Bagsannoyingconcerninghostilefrom $21.00
The Bottle Review BoardThe friend you love received one sealed bottle. It now has scorecards and award departments.Door Matsannoyingconcerninghostilefrom $49.00
The Breakroom ChefThe friend you love reheated one lunch. It now has a permanent demonstration checkpoint.Floor Matsannoyingconcerninghostilefrom $53.00
The Career AnnexThe retired friend you love now has a permanent career retrospective in every room.Postersannoyingconcerninghostilefrom $24.00
The Chain of CommandThe dog has the chair. They have the paperwork.Blanketsannoyingconcerninghostilefrom $30.00
The CharcuterieThe meats are arranged. Nobody may eat.Cutting Boardsannoyingconcerninghostilefrom $46.00