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You love your friends. We help you piss them off.
Weaponized FriendshipYou love them. That's why.

Personalized desk mat

Weaponized Friendship Desk Mats

Podcast Assignment

The friend you love sent one episode. The group chat now has a syllabus and progress trays.

$24.00

The desk mat, blank and unprinted
Annoying · Male desk mat proof

Threat level
Gender

Selected mat: Annoying · Male

Put their actual face on it (optional)

Putting a real face on the desk mat needs an account. Sign in first — or buy it as it comes.

Add desk mat text (optional)

Custom text needs an account. — the approved lines below print without one.

Downloads are delivered to an account. You can check out as a guest: sign in afterwards with the email you used at checkout, and the order and its files appear in your account.

How it works

  1. 1Choose the desk mat scene and threat level.
  2. 2Keep the stock scene or sign in to apply a permitted photo.
  3. 3Review the product view and the flat proof.
  4. 4Choose the available options and add it to your cart.
Specifications & details

Give the friend you love a listening desk for the episodes they assign as homework. They'll ask why one cheerful recommendation now needs a syllabus and progress trays. Pick how completely the queue took over. Buy our assigner as-is, or sign in to put your friend behind the blank cards, then add one approved line underneath.

Give the friend you love a listening desk for the episodes they assign as homework. They'll ask why one cheerful recommendation now needs blank trays, a progress board, and its own institute. Pick Annoying, Concerning, or Hostile. Keep our assigner, or send their photo with their blessing and put them behind the syllabus. Add one approved line underneath. Twelve by eighteen inches — a birthday, holiday, or just-because office or living-room assignment for a best friend, sibling, coworker, roommate, or partner whose group chat always has required listening.

  • Printed format: Desk Mats.
  • 1 size choices.
Personalization
The stock scene can be bought without an account. Replacing the featured face or adding approved lettering requires sign-in and a photo you have permission to use.
Production, cancellations & returns

Made to order. You can change or cancel it within 1 hour of buying. Shipping costs and taxes are shown at checkout before you pay.

Read the exact conditions for cancellations, damaged or misprinted goods, and non-arrival in our returns and refunds policy.